How to Tell that He Only Wants Sex

The other day I overheard a woman telling her friend about a guy I met recently at a dating site online. She really liked. She continued the story saying, thought he got along very well on their first date and so they started to date. Things were going great until he said he was not looking for anything too serious. He just wanted out. She did not know what to do with it. At first she thought to herself, “and forget, what’s the point.” Explained he did not want to jump into anything too seriously and instead wanted to meet. [Read: How to Get Out of a Bad Date Nicely]

He Likes Himself

He wants to impress you, because that’s his way into your knickers. He’ll bang on about his exotic travels, his amazing career and the time he lit a cigarette for Jeremy Clarkson.

But he doesn’t want to know much about you beyond whether you can cross your ankles behind your head. He may ask about your housemates, but only as research for when he invites himself back for coffee.

He Says it

Although it doesn’t always mean he just wants you for sex, it is a red flag. If a man is interested in something more serious he will most likely tell you. If he says he is just dating, having fun, and getting to know different people believe me he just wants you for sex. Basically he just wants to fuck you and move on to the next or maybe even keep you around until something better comes his way. Sorry to be so blunt, but I don’t know how else to put it. He wants the benefits of a relationship like having sex whenever you want minus the commitment.

He has no Emotions

Much has been said about love preceding sex for women while for men sex is equal to being in love. Despite such nuggets of pop wisdom, there is no denying the fact that a guy who is emotionally unsupportive of his partner is hardly relationship-material. Man or woman, every individual needs some kind of emotional bonding with a close partner – it is after all what makes us human. But if you find that you cannot get a word of support from your guy on a rough day or some sign of empathy when you are upset, it is certain that you have no use for him unless as someone to relieve his sexual itch.

He Doesn’t Spend Time with You

He isn’t too keen to spend time with you unless he knows you are going to have sex. Sunday afternoon picnics in the park or a casual stroll through the town museum never seem to figure in your relationship with this guy. The only times when you are together is either when he is getting you in the mood for sex or he is having a post-coital cup of coffee with you. The absence of quality time spent together foreshadows the lack of real bonding between a couple and means that his interest in you goes no further than sex.

What He Does After Session?

The time after making love is one of the most intimate phases for a woman when she feels a deep and emotional connection with her partner. While psychologists differ on whether the same is true for a man, there is no doubt that if a man is really in love with his partner he will cherish her desire for some post-coital bonding. On the other hand, if he simply gets up and leaves with some sorry excuse about having to put in overtime, you know that there is nothing other than sex which will keep him with you.

Once he’s got you back to his place (or yours) for sex, it’ll be fast and furious. He won’t spend time worrying about how to please you, because he’s the one who counts. Afterwards, he’ll roll over and sleep the sleep of the thoroughly shagged.

Late Night Dates

Basically he is looking for a “booty call.” Please don’t fall for the worked late excuse. When a guy is constantly calling you for a late night date he just wants you for sex. If he was really into you he would wine and dine you a little. He would make time for you at a reasonable hour and take you out on the town. When I was single I was dating a guy who would always have an excuse as to why he could only see me late in the evening. For about a month I bought his excuses. I eventually started to get the sneaking suspension something was off. I eventually found out he was in a “committed” relationship.

You Have Nothing in Common

One of the surest signs that a relationship is bound to go no further than sex is when that is all that binds you to your partner. If you find that you share no hobbies or interests with your guy, it is an indication that his attraction to you is virtually limited to sex. A meaningful relationship will always have common grounds like a mutual love for country music or a shared passion for travel. Even a broad spectrum of activities like outdoor pursuits or culinary interests can bind couples to one another on a deeper and more satisfying level.

If after a month nothing has progressed into something more serious then he just wants you for sex. I know some people may not agree with me and there are exceptions. However, if he really thinks you are a catch and someone he could see himself seriously dating it won’t take over a month for him to figure it out. If you are truly a catch, he would want to snatch you up before someone else does.

Read: Why Do Women Date Jerks

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